The Lazy Game of Thrones Recap: Arya goes to Assassin Camp!


There was much more action in this episode than in last week’s premiere. Arya goes to camp,  Jon Snow becomes the leader of the wall, and Daenerys had a family reunion!

Arya: The episode starts off with Arya arriving at Braavos and finally reaching the House of Black & White. Once there, she knocks on the door and a strange man opens the door. Arya tells the man that she was sent by Jaqen H’ghar and he tells her that no one is here by that name. Arya then says she has nowhere else to go and he replies with “you have everywhere else to go.” Man, this would be the worst guy to talk to if you’re looking for directions.

After being denied at the door, she waits on the steps of the building reciting her “death list” over and over again every day. She gets frustrated and decides to go explore the free city after she throws her coin in the river.

That's what I call dedication!

That’s what I call dedication!

While in the city looking for food, she is confronted by three hooligans (I’ve always wanted to use that word) who want to steal “needle.” Now, Arya at this point gives zero f**** and when she told those hooligans “nothing is worth anything to a dead man,” I may have started cheering. Anyway, it isn’t until the strange man from earlier shows up that those rapscallions (I’m loving these words) decided to scatter. Arya followed the man back to the house and asked who he was and he changed his face to reveal that he was in fact Jaqen H’ghar. He then said that he wasn’t Jaqen H’ghar, he was in fact no one and that’s who Arya needs to become. My Head Hurts……

Brienne/Podrick: The dynamic duo is eating and drinking at a local tavern when Podrick notices that who else but Littlefinger and Game of Thrones’s favorite punching bag, Sansa Stark are there as well. Brienne goes over to talk to Sansa to get her to come with her so Brienne can keep her safe. LittleFinger being the king of manipulation, brought up the fact that Brienne was in charge of protecting King Renly and Sansa’s mother and failed to do either. Sansa told Brienne that she saw her bow to King  Joffrey and when Brienne tried to explain herself, Sansa didn’t want to hear it.

New Sansa gives zero f****

New Sansa doesn’t take s*** from anyone

After leaving the Tavern, Brienne decides to kill some of LittleFinger’s soldiers and  free their horses before going off into the forest. At the same time, Podrick a.k.a. P-Money, is on struggle-mode trying to control his horse in the forest. While trying to get control of the horse, Podrick P-Money is attacked by soldiers, but Brienne kills them both—quite awesome-ly I might add. I’m not yet sure,  but I think Brienne might be starting to like having Podrick P-Money around…just saying.

King’s Landing: Cersei receives an early Christmas gift in the form of a snake–viper to be specific– statue with a necklace hanging from its mouth. What has her and Jaime worried is that the necklace in the snake’s mouth is the one that belongs to their daughter, who’s in Dorne.

Merry Christmas???

Merry Christmas???

Cersei starts yelling threats at Dorne and Jaime tells her to keep her voice down about Myrcella being “their” daughter which enrages Cersei. She begins to blame Jaime for all of their kids’ misfortunes, claiming he never did anything for any of his kids. Jaime decides he’s going to go to Dorne to get her back. He’s needs someone to go with him so he blackmails persuades Bronn to go with promises of a “better woman and better castle” when they return to King’s Landing.  Do I smell a spin-off series???

Dorne: The wife of Oberyn talked to the King of Dorne(Oberyn’s brother) about how Dorne plans on retaliating for the death of Oberyn Martell. She suggests sending the fingers of Myrcella to King’s Landing, but the king strongly advises against it. Later on, she visits the sand snakes who are all for the idea of getting revenge on the Lannister through Myrcella. I personally hope they don’t hurt that girl.

Castle Black:  Stannis offers Jon Snow the chance to become a Stark in exchange for Jon Snow participating in the war. Jon Snow declines being a soldier for his war because he wants to honor his vows to protect the wall. I really hope he reconsiders because I’ve been wanting him to be a Stark since Ned Stark got his head cut off……Spoilers.


Later that day, it was time to vote for the position of Lord Commander and the members of Castle Black are asked to elect fellow brothers for the job. Sam elects Jon and explains to everyone why Jon Snow is the only person for the job. Other members bring up how he broke his vows by sleeping with a woman who also happened to be a Wildling woman, but Sam defends him. The votes were counted and Jon Snow won the election by one vote.

Daenerys: Over in Meereen, a trial is set by the council for a member of the Sons of Harpy who was captured by Daario and Grey Worm. After Mossador (member of the council) decides to take matters in his own hands and kill the man before his trial, Daenerys sentences him to death. Honestly, I really felt bad for Dany in this situation because she really had no choice but to kill him; She has to let the other people of Meereen know that this behavior won’t be tolerated. After Mossador is executed, the people of Meereen lose their sh** and riot in the streets.

A FACE only a mother could love.....

A FACE only a mother could love…..

After everyone is tired from all the rioting they did, (it can be really exhausting you guys) Dany goes out to her balcony and sees one of her babies and by baby, I mean giant, fire-breathing dragon. It appears that Dany and Drogon shared a moment before he ultimately flew away, but it’s hard to tell what Drogon was feeling. Also, he’s going to be pissed once he realizes where his siblings are.

See you next week…….

Don’t forget to LIKE this post if you enjoyed it and if you didn’t, just like it anyway for funsies! 

Random Thoughts
  • I love how Little Finger said his wife had an “Untimely” death. Sure, Bro!
  • There’s nothing funnier than seeing Podrick trying to get rid of a soldier by throwing a rock at him.
  • Who the hell is Ostrich Stark?